What kind of domme am I?
There are many different types of domme personas, and I want to start this article by saying you do not have to pick only one! You can be a hard domme with a soft edge, or a bratty mommy domme, or an ethical witchy domme. You’re the domme in charge.
Having said that, it’s good to narrow in on what you like to do, and what you don’t, so you can know whether a potential sub is a good fit. It’s no fun pretending to be someone you don’t want to be.
This process might take some time. You might start off thinking you’re one thing, and after working with a few subs, discover you’re something completely different. I’ve seen dommes start off saying they’re soft, and discover they love humiliating subs. They just evolve, maybe change up the way they post, and the types of photos they take, and roll with being who they were meant to be.
Types of dommes
Before we delve into the types of personas, I want to give you some terms that describe dommes in general.
Lifestyle domme - A lifestyle domme lives her dominant persona. She might have subs who visit her in real life, or even have live in slaves who do her bidding. Lifestyle dommes often aren’t findommes, and there may not be an exchange of money for her services. Being a domme is how she lives, not what she does.
Pro domme - A pro domme dominates for a living. This type of domme might have a dungeon, or work at a variety of clubs that have dungeons. This type of domme mostly works in person.
Online domme - This type of domme does her work online, where most findommes practice their art. Most interactions do not take place in person. Payment, text or video chat—-it all happens on the internet.
Insta domme - Insta dommes are women who have taken up findom without doing any research, or understanding much about safety or domination beyond “be mean to men, and they’ll pay you”. This type of domme also mostly appears only online, and are the dommes you see responding to bait tweets, chasing subs, and generally giving findommes a bad name. Don’t be an insta domme.
Types of domme personas
OK, let’s get down to the reason you really came here. These are some options for you to consider when creating your persona…
Mommy domme - A mommy domme is just what it sounds like: a domme who approaches her time with subs as a mom. This type of domme nurtures her subs. Maybe she commands them to eat better, or work out, or advance in their jobs to earn her praise. Subs may want to take on a childlike role. This type of domme has to be good at balancing caregiving and nurturing with dominance.
Soft domme - A soft domme usually takes a gentle approach to domination, and can sometimes be quite sensual. She’s into pleasure, praise and encouragement. She’s probably not into calling her subs names, or hurting or humiliating them. She wants to have fun, and teases instead.
Bratty domme - Bratty dommes usually act spoiled, and are very demanding. They want what they want when they want it. A bratty domme is very “get me, buy me, do me”, and a bit high maintenance. This type of domme is very effective for younger women, but older dommes can be spoiled brats, too.
Witchy domme - Witchy dommes are generally incorporating their real life practice of witchcraft into their personas. She can have an earthy, nurturing vibe, or might be light and magical, or a dark goth.
Hard domme - A hard domme expects her sub to obey her often harsh commands. She is the domme that takes no BS from anyone, ever. She will melt you with a single gaze.
Sadistic domme - This is a domme who likes inflicting pain. She’s into torturing her subs, might enjoy CBT or giving CEI (check the glossary).
Humiliatrix - A humiliatrix is less about pain, and more about humiliation. She likes commanding her subs to degrade themselves, sometimes publicly.