How to use Discord for findom
Since the complaints about Twitter/X policies that throttle sex worker’s engagement have escalated this week, let’s talk about an often overlooked haven: Discord.
Why it’s great
Discord is basically a bunch of chat room servers. You can join a server, and chat via text or voice. Discord allows both pics and video. You can also chat privately, through your DMs, which allow you to limit who can contact you.
Why it’s not great
Every server is set up and run by its moderators, who make their own rules. If you think the verification rules for dommes are weird on Reddit, wait until you see them on Discord. There are often a lot of hoops to jump through to gain access to chat channels.
Findommes often set up servers for themselves, and limit access. Often, you will find channels that sound great, but the description ends with “we are not accepting any dommes at this time”. It can be a bit of a safari to find a server that’s a good fit.
Setting up shop
Create an account with your domme email, and set up both your user name and display name. Be sure to fill out your bio.
Now, you’ll want to hunt for servers to join. Do this on Disboard, which lists active servers, and shows their description and number of members. Search for findom, and you’ll find quite a long list of them. (For 2D findommes, search for 2DFD to get a list of servers that cater to your type of domme.)
Join some servers. Read the rules, and agree to them. If the server offers roles, go through the process of assigning yourself the appropriate ones. Look for the verification process, and follow the instructions to get verified. Then wait a bit, because real humans have to check your verification info.
Chat! Most servers have introduction channels. Say hello. Explore whatever channels are available to you. Make sure you check the guidelines for each channel before you post in them, so you’re putting the right things in the right channels. Also, be careful about promoting yourself in general chat channels. A good rule of thumb: if you don’t see anyone promoting themselves or dropping their links in a channel, don’t be the pushy domme who breaks the channel rules. It’s not worth it.
That’s it. Follow the rules. Make some friends. Flirt a little. Answer DMs.
Getting your own channel
Many findom servers will offer channels of their own to active dommes. That gives you a little space of your own, within a server that someone else runs, which can be a great bridge to setting up your own server. Having your own channel means you have the advantage of setting up your space in an already active community.
If you see that a server offers individual domme channels, ask a mod where the application for one is posted, and indicate your interest. I have one set up in Miss Mocha’s Cafe, a small 2DFD server, which the mod offered to me as soon as I verified. (Here’s the direct link to my channel.)
What’s your favorite?
Do you have a favorite Discord server? Or a server of your own? Drop the link below!